Learning To Love You More




Assignment #37
Write down a recent argument.

Brittanie Wine and Olga Brindar
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania USA



Argument between Brittanie and Dane. October 6th, 2005. Circa 2:00 pm.
Argument, Part I:
B: Ah boyface, I miss you. I'm sleepy.
D: I'm sorry.
B: I just don't know what to do, I work all the time and I just can't do anything right.
D: (silence)
B: I don't know if I'm just remedial and it takes me longer to do things than everyone else, or what, but I'm always awake and I'm always working and it's never good enough, and I'm still behind. (pause) You're mad at me again. No mad.
D: I'm not mad at you.
B: I love you!
D: I love you, too.
B: See, I can't do anything right. I'm not good at school and art and I can't make you happy.
D: Who says you're bad? Have you gotten any grades yet?
B: No, I say.
D: You call me crying every day about how much you hate everything; what do you want me to do about it?
B: Nothing. I'm not sad because of anything having to do with you. I don't see how this is going to work if I just make you mad every time I talk to you. I feel bad and I talk to you, and you get mad at me, and then I feel worse. Do you want me to just not tell you, or pretend, or make something up? All I think about is how much I suck at everything, so it's pretty much all I can talk about.
D: (silence)
B: Do you want me to let you go?
D: Yes, goodbye. (click)
Argument, part II:
B: Hey, sorry, I wasn't at my computer.
D: Okay.
B: We can talk whenever you want. It was my fault, I was being stupid. I'm sorry.
D: I have absolutely nothing to say. (pause) I don't remember ever being this mad at you before. Ever. How can you be this selfish? All that exists in your world is you, and the people that walk by you that you say hi to when you're on the phone with me.
B: Don't say that, I'm not being selfish.
D: Prove it.
B: Fine, I will.
D: Do you know what it's like to plan your life around one thing, and they don't care at all? I go to school in a place I don't like, with people I don't like, doing something I don't like so you can be happy, and you're not.
B: I feel bad. I'm sorry. I feel guilty that you gave up everything you want to do so that I can do what I want, and I don't even know what I want.
D: Don't feel bad. Don't feel guilty. I want to have a family. Sure, I'd love to sing, but I want to have a family, and I want it to be with you, and I want a cake job to provide for them. I don't wanna be like my dad, or like your dad used to be. The only way I'd change what I'm doing is if you left me. You know, all it takes for me to know this is all worthwhile, is for you to smile, and you can't even do that.
B: I'm usually fine, I promise!
D: No you're not, at least one hour every day you call me crying. Maybe if you switch it up every now and then and call me during one of the other twenty-three hours, I'll believe you. I have to call my mom and tell her when to expect me home. I'll call you from the road. (click)