ASSIGNMENTS:
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Claire Porter
Burlington, Vermont USA
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REPORTS:
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(submitted to ireport.com, burlingtonfreepress.com, Lunenburg Ledger)
July 31, 2008
LOCAL GIRL AVOIDS DANGEROUS PHONE CALL
Everyone knows that breaking up is hard, but when three years have passed since a drawn-out high school relationship, thoughts of ones ex should be infrequent and unemotional. However, this cannot be said for new local Vermont resident Claire Porter. She was driving home from a friend's house last night when a random thought once again sparked her memory of ex-boyfriend PDC. "It wasn't unusual to be thinking about him, since he was a big part of my life at one time- we dated for almost 2 years. I thought about calling him, which happens most often when I've had a few drinks, but this time I was able restrain myself." We attempted to contact PDC for comment but his Facebook has been deleted and he was not reachable by phone.
It is rumored that conversation with friends about the horrible break-up causes tears to well in Porter's eyes and her lips to quiver. "We all knew that he was a jerk and we tried to tell her but we really didn't expect it to last as long as it did. He cheated on her with a (expletive) 15 year-old girl..." says a friend who wishes to remain anonymous.
The aforementioned memory of the alleged cheater occurred after a dinner with some of Porter's friends. After spending several hours discussing the pros and cons of their relationships while Porter sat quietly in the corner, she realized it was time to go. She had very little to add to the conversation seeing as she has been single since the break-up in 2005. "I've tried to date other people but my last attempt was unsuccessful- J clearly preferred his bed-wetting ex over me." mumbled Porter with obvious contempt.
Porter will return to school in Vermont this fall and will be living in London next spring where she hopes to fall in love with an attractive, skinny British boy. Hopefully the feelings with be mutual and we wish her the best of luck.
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