ASSIGNMENTS:
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Laura Moulton
Portland, Oregon USA
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REPORTS:
PREVIOUS NEXT
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Advice to Laura at 15:
1. Quit worrying about feathering your bangs just right. (Later you'll learn about death squads and mass graves in Guatemala happening at the same time you were worried about your hair, and this will make you feel guilty).
2. Don't listen to Bishop Hodges: it's not true that it's better to die than to lose your "virtue."
3. A young woman will come to your Sunday School class dressed as a bride, to talk about what can be attained if the aforementioned virtue is left intact - don't believe that being a bride is all there is for you.
4. All this talk about virtue is going to make you want to unload yours as soon as possible, and even though it's Christopher Walken you decide to give up the gift for, he's apparently happily married to a dancer, so you'll opt for a Japanese kid who works the night shift stocking groceries at Albertsons. He has a scooter.
5. It's okay to do this. Looking back you'll feel curiosity, but not regret.
6. Get to know Uncle Dave better - in another 6 years he'll be found dead on a restroom floor in Baltimore, with cocaine and lots of hard alcohol in his system, and you'll be left with only a handful of family photos.
7. This year S.R. will draw a caricature of you as a hugely fat woman with a big bum and one arm outstretched holding a rose, with the words "God I'm so petite" penciled below it. Remember how terrible it feels to see that in the hall next to your locker, because in another 6 or 7 years in his apartment in Salt Lake City, he'll hand you a letter that says "I want to be your lover."
8. Don't go for it. After you date for 6 months and break up with him, he'll try and make you feel guilty for having sex. He'll say he'd never have done it with you if he didn't think you'd eventually get married in the temple.
9. Go ahead and travel like you want to, see the world, and don't worry that you'll grow up and be the eccentric chain-smoking auntie who never got married. You'll survive a motorcycle commute in Taiwan and a head wound in Ecuador and morning sickness in England.
10. And in the end you'll marry an interesting character and have 2 nice little kids, and it won't be true, those who said you were on the road to unhappiness and hardship if you didn't stay in the church, save yourself and get married in the temple. Don't fret: everything is going to be okay.
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